1. Wrote this today during class for xtra credit, the writing prompt was simply "write a story about a snow day" but I hope you guys like my twist on it ;)

    “Marvin wake up!!!” I heard as my beautiful dreamscape shattered. I was just in bed having the dream of my life as my sister had woken me up. She stood right above me with a big innocent look on her face.

    “It’s snowing outside!” she said and was now pulling my arm. I reluctantly accepted and jumped onto my hoverboard. I hope she didn’t get the holidays mixed up, it was supposed to be Christmas, not April Fool’s Day.

    My eyes were still kinda groggy, and as I checked my holophone it was only 5 am. This better be good. I yawned and my robot assistant reminded me that getting up early is unhealthy. Gee, thanks.

    As the robots fed me food and brushed my teeth my thoughts began to wonder on the concept of “snow.” I remember hearing about this soft, cold white substance back in old 2020’s cartoons (I am a huge geek for them) and seen pictures of it on the internet but it was always only just an AR thing. REAL snow wasn’t a thing anymore - it was always too hot now for it to ever snow.

    I bought an AR thing once but it was so horrible and creepy, I was constantly bombarded with advertisements about my personal life. I remember one advertisement told me to replace my best friend with A.I! How horrible, I may be old fashioned but I prefer to talk to a real human, sorry if that offends anyone! The one thing I like about my country is that thoughtcrime isn’t a thing here.

    I didn’t like it so I had to sell it to earn some extra cash. My friend, Sav loved it though - he said it distracted him from the harsh realities of life. For some context, we’re both stuck in the same hellish situation; hellish in more ways than one.

    Back in the 2040’s we discovered a very cheap way to teleport people to Mars. My mother, a strong-willed woman wanted to start a family on this new planet but she was originally too poor to go. She was so excited to go, when she found out that she was screwed over.

    This company called Ouroboros was seriously evil and I resent them for it. They charged people exorbitant amounts just to go when I strongly believe it should be available in every city for free - it would be so easy to implement. This just shows corporate evil though. I’m usually pretty stoic but the name of the company brings me to anger.

    And so, my mother had to settle right here on Earth and had two kids. She ended up dying of heart disease later too, so its not like this story has a happy ending.

    “Marvin, you seem to be in deep contemplation. Would you like some orange juice?” asked my robot assistant Piara.

    “Yes please!” I called out and she handed it to me. I loved orange juice, it reminded me of the time my mother used to give me it and tell us stories about the past. As I sipped it, I used my other hand to grab my sunglasses off the table. I looked so cool with them. It was now time and I took a dramatic step forward.

    I took more steps as I headed off outside and my jaw opened. My glasses fell off too and it only further confirmed reality. It was snowing! I rushed outside and jumped into it without thinking - a rare act for me. It was really real!

    As I heard my sister yelling with joy I was just so elated. I licked the snow and grabbed it and rubbed it all over me without care. I was usually more inhibited, but today was a different day. My eyes started watering, I didn’t even care that my sister could see me cry now. (I never cry in front of people)

    I picked up some sticks that had fallen from the trees and thought about making a snowman like they did in old cartoons. I called out for Piara and she threw over some carrots and googly eyes.

    “MAYA! Let’s make a snowman!” I called out to my sister. She ran over to me and I hugged her, tears running down my eyes. I placed down the materials near a small hole next to my foot and she started rolling up the bottom of the snowman.

    The snow was deep enough to bury up to my socks now. I helped my sister gather up more snow and we got up to the mid section. I put the arms in and almost wanted to hug it too but I resisted. I didn’t want to accidentally knock it over because I cared too much for it.

    We built the head and I poked a mouth in with my finger. Putting in the googly eyes was awkward, but we made it work.

    “What do you want to call him?” she asked.

    “Frosty.” I said, making a clever reference.

    The snowman was complete, we stood back and took a picture with our holophones and added a caption: “Best Christmas ever, 2059” I wasn’t even going to post it on social media, I just wanted to keep it for myself to forever cherish it.

    At this moment, my friend Sal flew over to our house with his hoverboard.

    “Oh my god, hi Sal!” I called out and he had a wide smile on his face.

    “So you like the snow, eh?” asked Sal, he had an Indian accent because he was originally born there. We lived in America and I welcomed the diversity. Sal was the type of guy who was sort of a cool genius, he knew how everything worked and was interconnected but he was also the type that could chill and make good jokes.

    “I LOVE IT!” I said, sounding like a energetic schoolgirl.

    “Well…” he said, leaning in to whisper.

    “I caused it.”

    “What?” I asked as my emotions flurried around.

    “My grandfather lended me this old machine he was working on that could theoretically freeze and milk clouds to cause them snow… its kind of complicated but I ended up finding out how to work it again.” he said.

    “WHAT?” I repeated again, this time my joy deflating like a balloon.

    “I caused you one of your best days!” he said, not reading my facial expression that was DEFINITELY not happy.

    “But its all fake?!” I called out.

    “Calling it “fake” would be hypocritical. Do you think the emotions you gained from this are fake?” asked Sal.

    “Well no…”

    “It’s all relative. My snow is as real as your emotions” said Sal.

    I was still furious I was lied to. Was it really okay that he deceived me, or was it my fault for getting so hot-headed? Similar questions spun in my head as I thought of what to say next.

    “But if we just accept lies then real things become meaningless!” I called out and Sal thought about this.

    “You’d never had seen snow without my help” he said, “I was just trying to be honest, but based on your feedback you’d rather have me lie that it was natural snow?” he asked.

    We started bickering about the morals and ethics about lying and we never came to an agreement. I had a point, and he had a point. We were deadlocked on our opinions, but what about you?

    (btw this is just a placeholder title; feel free to suggest a new one)
  2. damn this reached the second page with no responses, bump
  3. Husky

    Husky Well-Known Member

    It's because most forumers are too lazy to read
    • Agree Agree x 1
  4. dab
    • Agree Agree x 1
  5. Cemeteries

    Cemeteries Well-Known Member

    I really liked it! I think there were some unnecessary uses of parentheses to describe thoughts, like saying Marvin never cries in front of anyone, it’s already shown through his emotions and how he didn’t care if his sister saw him cry. An extra line could’ve been added, like:

    I don’t care if my sister sees me cry, I don’t care if anyone sees me cry right now, the snow is just so beautiful and amazing.

    You’re showing the reader instead of telling the reader, and every reader appreciates it.
    • Like Like x 1

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