Happy new year! I hope 2019 will be better than 2018 for everyone. I am already in 2019 and this is why I’m making this thread now. I want this year to be pivotal in my reputation within this community and I’d like to right my wrongs. Making this apology thread is the first step I’ve decided to take and I’m posting it in the blitz section because this really only applies to the blitz community as I don’t play other hypixel minigames. Now, I’ll get to the point of this thread. If you don’t know who I am or simply don’t care about me in any way, I guess this thread doesn’t apply to you, but I think quite a few people have heard my name and not in a positive context. I’ve cheated, been toxic and generally showed signs of immaturity. I want to come completely clean in this thread in order to show I have nothing to hide and apologize for all the things I did which may have hurt others. First of all, I’d like to come clean in terms of cheating. I’ve cheated from May or June 2016 until June 2018. To be specific, I autoclicked throughout that whole time. I also got banned once for bhopping as I thought it was a funny joke with friends at the time and I used reach in October of last year for only a week. After that 1 week is when I started getting hackusated constantly. Since June 2018, I’ve stopped all of my cheating behaviour and have not touched any client or autoclicker since then. This was mainly thanks to cheatbreaker which was coming out this summer. If you don’t know what cheatbraker is, it’s a client, like badlionclient, which prevented cheating on this server called minehq. It was a very successful overall product. So, cheatbreaker pushed me to start clicking again and it was hard. I could not click above 6 cps for about 2 weeks. Since then, 100% of my games on hypixel have been played without an autoclicker or any other cheat. I understand I deserve all the hate for cheating for such a long period of time. I apologize for this. Second of all, I’d like to come clean regarding all of my infractions. I have over 20 infractions in total. I’m not sure if this is 100% accurate, but I counted 18 mutes and 7 bans. All of my mutes were a result of toxic behavior towards staff or players, 5 of my bans were a result of more toxic behavior and the other 2 bans were a result of me cheating. I haven’t had any infractions as far as I remember in the period between 2015-2017. Then, when I changed my name to Oculysm for the first time is when I started acting carelessly again. I wanted to create a new persona and instead ended up being toxic, immature and hateful most of the time. Since then, I’ve had a huge number of conflicts with varying players, been involved in doxing scenarios and even threatened to swat someone. I understand that that is shameful behavior and I don’t deserve any respect. I apologize for this too. Why am I making this thread? I want to change myself. I don’t want to have any personal conflicts with anyone in the community. I don’t want to be known as a toxic player. I don’t want to be known as a cheater. I’m writing this thread in order to take my first step towards rehabilitation as a player and as a personality in the blitz community. I’ve been telling myself that I don’t care about blitz or the community anymore for a longtime, but I guess it’s inevitable that playing blitz for 5 years has made it almost a part of me and my life. It influenced me in ways other things didn’t. I don’t want to just throw that away, I want to have an impact on the community or at least be remembered as an honourable player. Everyone who I’ve ever been toxic or extremely offensive to - I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have acted how I did. It’s time for me to start acting like an adult and own up to my mistakes. I don’t want to have any more childish arguments or call someone the n word because they beat me in a video game. I apologize for all of those things and understand they were wrong. I’m sorry. I understand if people will keep hating me for the things I said or did. It never just goes away. But I hope throughout 2019 I can change your opinion about me and become someone that people actually look up to instead of look down at. I don’t want to be known for the things I feel like I am currently known for. I’m going to ask everyone who dislikes me to give me a second chance, and I will do the same for them. My goal is to change the reputation of the name Oculysm. And this path starts now. I have cleared my 47 page ignore list which took me over 40 minutes. I hope that at the end of 2019, this list will stay exactly like this: http://prntscr.com/m1pkcn Thank you if you actually read the whole thing. I hope you understand why I want to change myself and I also hope that, if we had any bad blood between us before, we can start over from a clear page. I hope me coming completely clean and apologizing has convinced you that I’m trying to better myself and my attitude. I’m sorry for everything. EDIT: If for some reason you think I sold my account, I didn't. This is the original owner of this account and I've always owned it. If you heard that I sold my account, that's not true.